May 27, 2014

The S.A.M. Story Part XIX


As the relationship had been full of unexpected fun and surprises he wanted his proposal to be nothing less than unique and exceptional and something she didn't see coming. He wanted to keep it edgy and lively. Something beyond belief, that would shock her and that she would never forget.  So he asked his best friend who was a musician to compose music for "her song".  He then enthusiastically detailed a plan of how he would 'present' it to her.

The day was approaching; a deadline of sorts for her.  So much was going on inside as she felt apprehensive, anxious, scared and a deep sadness knowing that there would be a loss of varying degrees to be grieved.  She decided because of unforeseen possibilities she would contact and inform him before her surgery about her medical condition.  Just in case. 

She knew and accepted, that after she "sent" this last text, that her life was about to change in many ways.  Her priorities, her outlook, her routine, her future.  Although she knew that much, she had no idea what those words would actually “look” like.  What they would play out in day-to-day living.  What her prospective life would be.  Who she would be tomorrow.  Or even just a few hours later.  But she was ready.  Well, as ready as you can be for something that had no guarantee. 

Not knowing what her post surgery prognosis would be was one thing, but letting him go, losing him, was going to be the hardest.  Because she did not know what his response would be and how she would be affected by it.  She did not know if she would ever see him again, because it would be up to him, whether he would ever want to see her again.  

Over time, he had become part of her daily life.  What she woke up to, thought about continually, and formulated her life around.  He had become a part of her.  Something she could no longer deny nor erase even if she wanted to, as he had become engraved on her heart.  She was forever changed by admitting him into her life and would never be able to alter that, even if desired.  His absence would leave an undeniable void.  (What she didn't know was that he, her cyber-heart mate, had already made his decision). 

She felt most comfortable texting her final words as technology had always been their primary way of communicating.  So she typed out a short letter: 'Hey u.....a new S.A.M....I have to have surgery very soon.....I will talk to u as soon as it's over.....I am sending u my "love story" so u know where my heart and time has been spent for most of the year......please read, knowing how "real" it is for me and how my life will forever be changed because of it.  And always remember the words 'she' longed to hear in the ending of her story were: "I now pronounce you man and wife".  

For although her fairy tale story had started modern, she still wanted it to end classic.

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