July 10, 2011

"Some People Come Alive After They're Dead....

Just like when mummies stay in toilet paper a long time-they come back alive." ~R.T.  (5 yrs. old)

I'm not quite sure what image this little girl had when she made this comment.

I wondered if she had peeked in on my private world and was viewing me.

Forlorn and heartbroken.
Barely a heartbeat of desire-to-go-on left within me.
All wrapped in Kleenex (which could look like toilet paper to a child.)

And how after I had felt my heart die - I had come back to life.

I, like some people, had to lose my life as I knew it to come back alive.

I would not recommend this method of self actualization and yet for many of us it comes uninvited.
Through loss due to:  illness, finances, death, divorce, children (or lack of), dreams, addictions, love, and many more trials. 

What is our choice is whether we will revive that lost breath of hope.
THIS I do recommend!

That was over a dozen years ago for me.

On a small scale I think we are all given regular opportunities to shed the old us and come back alive as a new "me".

Are we using this chance wisely?
Are we exfoliating the things we don't like about us to make room for new growth/experiences we do want? 
Are we happy with who we are becoming?
Are we willing to eliminate or add to help that to happen?

Life is beautiful behind all that toilet paper!
(I wanted to say, "Let's leave all the crap behind." but I don't think that sounds very nice.  So I won't say it.)

Perhaps death in this form is the prescription we need to live!

"The resurrection gives my life meaning and direction and the opportunity to start over no matter what my circumstances."  ~Robert Flatt

July 3, 2011

It's A Party! B.Y.O.P. (Pity)

I put on an elaborate, red-carpet party a couple of weeks ago.

When I have these kind of parties I go all-out!

It lasted a good 2-3 hours.  (But I had a preview the night before too.)

I don't think I forgot anything.
There was weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth.

Background music by Ugly Cry.
Repeatedly singing, "Oh woe is me."

Decorations everywhere by Puffs.

It was a Big Pity Party!

The only other attendee was God.

I covered everything- going back in the archives, pulling out the micro fiche from my childhood even.

As with any good party, I was exhausted and relieved when it was all over.

It is healthy for me to do this once in awhile.

After I whine about my life and circumstances and feel sorry for myself I can wipe away the excess moisture, get out of bed (or off the floor), straighten my hair and start cleaning up.

It is then that I can see clearly:
All the ways that I have been blessed,
That it isn't as bad as I dramatized,
That some things (and people) in life are out of my control,
And that God was there all along.

I have found if I have these parties as needed (making sure I don't become a lifetime pity party) that I am less likely to have them in front of others.

That I am more able to sort out and deal with the challenges that ride on life's back - (like a flea infestation on a dog .)

So pity parties are a good thing
And you are more than welcome to come....

But you have to bring your own pity.

"Allow yourself a moment of grief when life's misfortunes visit you.  However, do not spend your days building a monument in honor of them."  ~Dodinsky, www.dodinsky.com
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